{"id":3768,"date":"2026-11-03T22:10:44","date_gmt":"2026-11-04T03:10:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/vr-news.net\/?p=3768"},"modified":"2026-11-03T22:10:44","modified_gmt":"2026-11-04T03:10:44","slug":"making-superglue-death-metal-shithouses-great-again","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/vr-news.net\/?p=3768","title":{"rendered":"Making Superglue, Death Metal, Shithouses Great Again"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Damn but we’re tired of a racist, petty, what-about-me child in the White House. For solace: He’s hopefully heading for the losingest fail of his long loser’s life – and maybe a jail cell please? – and there are many, many people just as tired, with good shticks to match. This week saw some truly stellar trolling from, in turn, Obama, Norway and a heroic guy in South Carolina who managed to foist the Jonestown Massacre on the latest Nazi rally. Well done, all.<\/p>\n

There’s nothing like hearing Obama at his recent campaign appearances – in Georgia, Michigan, Ohio – to be starkly reminded there are no grown-ups left in the fake-gold-encrusted room of the current regime. Yes we know: he was seriously flawed, and failed to achieve much of what he promised. Still, it was bracing to see him smoothly obliterate<\/a> the mad child-king, first with his crack about Saddam’s Cheesecake Factory, then by skewering a president (sic) who spends his time “doing arts and crafts” in the Oval Office and who, after his just critiques of war, inflation, apocalyptic decline and “unprecedented corruption” chose to “mobilize a whole government response” not to those issues, but to a cheesecake joke: “This is what I mean. These are not serious people.”<\/p>\n

Next was Norway’s gleeful response to Trump’s petulant whining (still) <\/em>about the Nobel prize won by “a woman nobody ever heard of” – Navanetham Pillay, a renowned South African jurist who’s spent decades seeking accountability for war crimes, sexual violence and genocide from Rwanda to Gaza at the ICC and as UN High Commissioner for Human Rights – and not to him, who’s “settled 8 (imaginary) wars and I’ve got 2 more coming.” “‘What about me?'” he bleated<\/a> in Michigan of the “disgraceful” choice. “So I\u2019m not in love with Norway. I don’t want anybody from Norway. Frankly, Norway sucks. Norway has become a shithouse country, actually.\u201d Thus did a sulky illiterate toddler toss<\/a> <\/a>(blond!) Norway in with Haiti, Libya, Somalia, mangling the “shithole” epithet en route. <\/p>\n

Norwegian officials, evidently grown-ups, took the picayune insult and ran with it. First, they calmly noted Trump “knows very well” the prize isn’t awarded by the government but by an independent Nobel committee. “We have reminded him of that, in case anyone is wondering,” said Foreign Minister Espen Barth Eide. Then he took pity on the wretched child. “The president is currently in the midst of an election campaign that perhaps isn’t going <\/a>very well for his party,” he calmly added. “That leads him to say a lot of things.” At home, Bernie Sanders slammed an “insane” babysitting task. “Norway is one of the most democratic and prosperous countries on earth. Free college, strong democracy, free press,” he declared. “We have a mentally unbalanced president.”<\/p>\n

Norway, with just 5.6 million people, likewise boasts one of the world’s highest gross national incomes and top ratings for education and life expectancy, its largest sovereign wealth fund, <\/a>and for the 10th consecutive year first place in the World Press Freedom index. It also has some of the world’s most dazzling landscapes – rugged fjords, thunderous waterfalls, sweeping vistas, colossal mountains along 18 designated Scenic Routes<\/a> – along with, its tourism bureau happily brags, “some of the world’s most spectacular toilets,” many of them sleek, award-winning<\/a> “architectural masterpieces” that combine minimalist designs with breathtaking views. “These toilets are worth a visit,” they crow, “both when you really have to go – and when you don\u2019t.\u201d<\/p>\n

“Yes, Donald, we are a ‘shithouse country,'” proudly proclaims the Norwegian Public Roads Administration, taking Michelle Obama’s famous “when they go low” approach under the news headline, “Straight Into the Toilet.” Norway is, after all, “the home of the outhouse,” they note, which many residents connect to the country’s hardy traditions and longtime “cabin culture.” Visit Norway<\/em>, <\/a>its official tourism board, went<\/a> further, showcasing its striking “lovely lavatories.” “We’ve heard some chatter about a ‘shithouse country.’ Well, what can we say? Norway makes shit houses great again!,” they wrote, <\/a>urging tourists to “take your time and enjoy. Yes, Norway has some spectacular scenery. It just happens to have some pretty spectacular toilets, too. <\/strong>With <\/strong>love, Visit Norway<\/em>.“<\/strong><\/p>\n

<\/strong>The site <\/strong>highlights<\/a> the wave-shaped Ureddplassen toilet on the coast of Helgeland in the north, hailed by designers as the most scenic restroom in the world. Also the solar-powered bog at the Utsikten viewpoint, the elegant Tungeneset loo – \u201cLooks pretty good under the Northern Lights\u201d – and, for “the bully <\/a>in kindergarten,\u201d the triangular \u201cGolden Toilet,\u201d or \u201c<\/strong>Gulldassen,\u201d <\/strong>at Ersfjordstranda on Senja island, recently paired with a glamorous new silver service building: “If you are a mere mortal like us and can\u2019t afford a gold-plated toilet seat, the Golden loo (on) Senja is the next best thing.\u201d Coming soon: a forest-themed wooden loo made from over 60 trees “for the pit stop of your life.” Visit Norway on the “immense” response: “The world needs a little laugh.”<\/p>\n

Finally, bravely facing off against the horrors<\/a> of a vengeful, demented, badly-accordion-playing rapist implausibly in power comes<\/a> “absolute legend” and hero without a cape Tom Hoyle, 57, a South Carolina graphics designer in a bushy beard, baseball cap and t-shirt for heavy metal band Death<\/em>: “I look like you, but I’m not like you,” he says of fortuitously blending into a MAGA mob. “I’m the vampire during the day.” A longtime Republican until he wasn’t, he runs MadPark Designs, which in recent dark days has done screen printing and embroidery for No Kings rallies, George Floyd protests, LGBTQ-led music org We Rock Charlotte etc. Now, MadPark is “being bombarded<\/a> by 5-star reviews” thanks to Hoyle’s unplanned “25 seconds of fame” at his local Nazi rally.<\/p>\n

The backstory:<\/a> Hoyle has hated Trump since his infamous 1980s attack on the Central Park Five, now Exonerated Five – “I decided, ‘You’re dead to me, and hopefully to everybody else'” – but what “pushed me over the edge” this week was the GOP calling his shop (wait, they do that?) to urge him to attend Friday’s rally for clueless Darline Graham. “We despise that,” he says, “so we thought we’d turn the tables on them, do something goofy and make some good trouble,” maybe some friendly neighborhood heckling. He slipped in through security by “talking in circles” about heavy metal and his shirt: “Death<\/em> is the most hardcore death metal. You see somebody in a Death<\/em> shirt and you know they’re interested in humanity.” He didn’t expect what came next: a Fox<\/em> mike in his face.<\/p>\n

His now-viral wisecrack<\/a> (see below) was entirely off the cuff, though he recalled seeing memes comparing MAGA to 1978’s gruesome Jonestown Massacre, <\/a>a mass murder\/suicide in Guyana wherein over 900 glassy-eyed disciples of Jim Jones drank cyanide-laced Kool-Aid to fulfill “a madman\u2019s fever dream.” The joke on the difference between Trump and Jones: Trump would charge you for the Kool-Aid before you died. When the Fox<\/em> guy asked why Hoyle was here, he had his punchline. As he headed to the exit and Secret Service approached, he innocently asked if this was about the concession stand; alarmed, they asked what he’d done there. “Nothing,” he said, “but it was closed super early and I was starving.” Then he kept walking. He’d like to thank Billy Crystal for his epic timing. We’d like to thank him for his ray of light.<\/p>\n

“The devil\u2026the prowde spirite\u2026cannot endure to be mocked.\u201d <\/em> \u2015 Thomas More<\/p>\n